Aug. 29, 2008 - Suckers And Such

News came this week that the format for NASCAR's Budweiser Shootout was changing — again.

The last time it changed, everyone looked at the new scenario for qualifying and called it the Dale, Jr. rule, put in place to make sure Junior would be in the race after he had been locked out the year before.

This year's change is just as transparent and is another bit of NASCAR misdirection.

All of the manufacturers have complained about the Car of Tomorrow because it is essentially a spec racer only differentiated by decals. Any other relation to the street car it supposedly represents is purely coincidental.

Instead of working to change that aspect of the CoT for the companies it truly cannot live without, NASCAR has thrown the manufacturers a tiny bone — giving Shootout spots to the top six drivers from each manufacturer, balancing the field and putting the onus on the manufacturers for opening day.

It's sort of like playing poker out of two decks — "Don't like the hand you've got over there? Here, try this one."

Problem is, if you sit down at a poker table and can't spot the sucker, it's you.

The manufactuers (and the drivers) have been dealt lousy hands by NASCAR when it comes to the CoT. Do the manufacturers really think they're holding a full house by getting a little extra buzz before the Shootout?

Suckers.

Aug. 20, 2008 - Forced Hands

NASCAR did what it had to do Wednesday when Nationwide Series officials dropped a Thor-sized hammer on Joe Gibbs Racing.

Seven crewmembers, including chiefs Jason Ratliff (No. 18) and Dave Rogers (No. 20), were suspended indefinitely for their roles in trying to subvert a chassis a NASCAR-required dyno test after Saturday’s race at Michigan Int’l Speedway.

The suspended group evidently conspired to cheat the test by placing quarter-inch spacer magnets beneath the gas pedal of both cars, effectively producing a false horsepower reading.

It was a pretty dumb — and costly — move. Whenever or if they are instated by NASCAR Joe Gibbs has intimated that some if not all could lose their jobs.

Problem is, NASCAR might as well have issued them the magnets.

Earlier this season, Nationwide Series officials ordered Toyota entries to cut 15 horsepower from its engines despite not finding any rules infractions. The JGR engine shop was simply doing a better job within the parameters of the rules of creating horsepower, the same way Robert Yates Racing did for years under the Ford banner.

Understandably, the JGR crews were ticked, feeling they were being singled out by NASCAR because of The Big Three and residual anti-Toyota sentiment in the sport.

The result was an ill-conceived attempt to get back at NASCAR for continuing to rewrite rules in chalk and enforce them on the fly in the name of competition.

The penalties were severe and necessary — again, NASCAR did what it had to do.

But I believe the guys working on those cars felt the same way when they tried to trick that dyno.

Aug. 14, 2008 - Newman's New Beginning

Ryan Newman is in need of a fresh start. According to the Associated Press, the Daytona 500 champion is getting his long-rumored rebirth with Stewart-Haas Racing next season.

An announcement is expected Friday at Michigan Int’l Speedway, which is just a short drive from Newman’s hometown of South Bend, Ind. There, Newman will be officially introduced as the driver of the No. 4 and as Stewart’s new teammate for the first year of the new team that wanted Stewart so badly that owner Carl Haas coughed up half-ownership of the team.

While there were several drivers that could have been considered for the seat, Newman makes the most sense for Stewart. Both are native Hoosiers and both graduated the USAC ranks before Stewart landed with Joe Gibbs Racing, where he won a pair of Cup championships, and Newman went to Team Penske.

The highlight of Newman’s career came with this year’s Daytona 500 victory. Like Stewart, he is extremely talented, but his maddening inconsistency has kept him from a series title.

It’s hard to say whether the move will help him win a championship, but it was just one of those situations where both parties agreed it was just time for a change.

The fit with Stewart and Newman should be a good one. In addition to the Indiana connection, they are friends off the track and get along – perhaps because of their differences as much as their similarities. Newman is a bit more cerebral, while Stewart has been known to, as they say, “howl at the moon” on occasion. (The previous statement is not a comment on Stewart’s noted “furriness.”)

If Stewart’s USAC and World of Outlaws teams are any indication, there is no doubt that Stewart will do everything he can to make Stewart-Haas a winner.

Getting Newman on board was a good first step toward that goal.

Aug. 8, 2008 - Better Living

Kannapolis, N.C., is my adopted home. Here’s why: I am the grandson of three Carolina textile workers, so I know something about a lot of the people there.

They’re as real as can be, deep-rooted as live oaks in the things that matter in life — The Bible, the U.S. of A, the Tar Heels and car racing (not necessarily in that order).

And they worked hard at the largest textile mill in the country, Cannon Mills, until it was sold off by billionaire investor David Murdoch and the town imploded, like so many other mill towns across the Carolinas.

One other little thing about Kannapolis, its favored son was a hard-driving fellow by the name of Dale Earnhardt, who could drive a race car so well he wouldn’t have to work at the mill. As his legend grew, so did the affection Kannapolis had for him. The phrase, “Matthew, Mark, Luke and Earnhardt,” which was the name of a song performed by jockey-turned-singer Shane Sellers, is a truism.

So upon his death, the Dale-loving folks in Kannapolis erected the Dale Trail, an afternoon drive that takes Dale-loving folks from everywhere through the key parts of Earnhardt’s life — from his humble beginnings in Kannapolis down Highway 3 all the way over to Dale Earnhardt, Inc. headquarters. And people made pilgrimages to travel the Dale Trail, still do. I’ve seen them, riding in SUVs and cars with the No. 3 in the windows and on Harleys.

The Dale Trail was marked by banners on light poles along the highway — at least until a couple of weeks ago when all of them disappeared. Apparently, Murdoch’s marketing company was bringing in a big-money investor to look over Kannapolis and the feeling was the Dale Trail and its signage would offend said investor, who was being courted to invest in what the former mill village is becoming — Murdoch’s research campus, an impressive layout of plans and buildings that is supposed to return jobs to Kannapolis.

Speculation was the investor was Oprah, but that didn’t make sense to me. Oprah is a North Carolina girl, so on some level, she would get the whole Dale-thing. Turns out, it was Martha Stewart. Yes, really. What’s the show? The magazine? “Better Living?”

As you might imagine, there was more than a little righteous indignation in Kannapolis, a town that’s been put through a lot the past decade or so — losing its mill, losing jobs, losing Dale.

And this little episode makes me sad. Maybe the Dale Trail was a bit overboard for people who didn’t worship Earnhardt, but it was sincere and Kannapolites would stand up straight and say, “This is who we are.”

I say, you either accept that or you don’t, regardless of how much money you’ve got, and if you can't, the Hamptons is nice this time of year. So is Cape Cod. Pick one.

“Matthew, Mark, Luke and Earnhardt.”

Maybe that’s Better Living.