READING, Pa. — Leah Pruett, I’ve never met you but am looking forward to the pleasure. Actually, to be honest, I don’t believe I ever heard your name before this past weekend. That’s understandable — you’re only 19 years old. (And I’m guessing I haven’t been on your radar.)
Anyway, congratulations on your tremendous opportunity to take a drive test soon in Gary Scelzi’s Mopar/Oakley Dodge Charger Funny Car. The car is a beast. But, Don Schumacher tells us that you are the beauty.
He didn’t use that word. But he said you’re pretty. He said that about Melanie Troxel, too, when he hired her for the first time, back in 2000.
“She’s attractive and we can market her” is what he said that day at Indianapolis when he made that announcement. I gasped. In an era in which women drive station wagons on steroids, assert themselves in the corporate world and command attention that even has altered the English language, that comment seemed so stale and so politically incorrect.
Melanie Troxel is decidedly attractive, articulate and intelligent. But what about her driving ability? She has more than proven that, but that’s not what Schumacher talked about.
You know, it was funny…Nobody else in the room that day seven years ago expressed any surprise. I looked around, and not even Troxel looked fazed by the remark. “I didn’t hear him say it,” she told me several years later. “I was on Cloud 9 [about getting hired to drive for his well-heeled team].”
I asked him to tell me about you, and he said, “She’s 19 years old, about 5-foot-5 or 5-6 with long blonde hair.”
Wondering if he wanted a drag-racing champion or Miss America — or some hybrid queen of the quarter-mile — I asked him if a driver has to be pretty to join Don Schumacher Racing. I mean, he has told one of 40-50 male applicant for Scelzi’s soon-to-be-vacated seat that he’s looking for somebody — no offense, he said — better looking.
“How could a compliment be bad?” he replied.
Well, now that sounds logical enough, doesn’t it?
“Let’s be realistic,” Schumacher said. “We have to remember this is entertainment. We’d be foolish not to use every asset.”
I asked what kind of sponsorship you would bring to DSR. “I don’t need somebody to bring money. That’s not a requisite,” Schumacher said. “I need somebody who’s a character. Gary Scelzi is a character. My son is a character. Jack Beckman is on his way to becoming a character. John Force is a character. The sport needs that.”
So Leah, you must be a character. Terrific! We’ll get along great. But I’m wondering what sort of shtick you do. I mean, are you like Lucille Ball? I love that episode in which she goes to work on the assembly line at the chocolate factory. Whatever is in your repertoire, it entertains Schumacher. So that’s positive.
Please don’t think I’m being catty. I’m just asking that people recognize your intelligence, your drag-racing experience and your sense of professionalism. And Schumacher did say repeatedly that you “have the desire, the drive and the determination” to succeed.
I’m not jealous — don’t want to drive Gary Scelzi’s car. Maybe I’m just disappointed that women haven’t shaken the “woman-driver” label and can’t be referred to simply as a driver.
It would be presumptuous of me to urge aspiring female racers to refuse a driving contract if the team owner stresses looks and neglects to talk about one’s ability to win races. I sure would hate to suggest to aspiring female racers that they adopt a strict diet and become a regular iron pumper at the local gym or visit Victoria’s Secret for…you know…secrets. And I don’t in any way want to suggest that Don Schumacher doesn’t much care about driving ability.
That would be ugly.